Nadia

"Sorry to bother you, but I just had to come over and tell you that you have the most beautiful eyes I've ever seen". Sweet, flattering, and possibly embarrassing (or blushworthy). Could possibly lead to a date, whether asked for that day or the next.

"I've seen you out here before, and I don't know if you believe in love at first sight, but I wanted you to know I love you" Gets the arched brow, an "ummm, ohkaaaayyyy???" And a muttered "WTF" as I walk away. It could be seen as sweet but dumb, but it also could weird someone out, as shown above. If a woman (not necessarily pancake) were to even speak to him again (and not walk away when he was spotted), he'd have hurdles to climb to even get a possibility of a first date.

Tranquility

Its kind of depressing that we need to think the worst of someone when they wear their feelings on their sleeves and finally build up the courage to approach the person they think about constantly.

He could be the sweetest, most romantic guy in the world. Or he could be a possessive, abusive stalker.

It is flattering to know someone thinks the world of you. But in this case, I probably wouldn't give him the benefit of the doubt.

Telling someone you have loved them from the first moment you saw them AFTER you have successfully negotiated some dates and fostered a great relationship with them: OK.

Telling someone you have loved them from the first moment you saw them the first time you talk to them: NOT OK.

Rosemaery Lorefield

Right? Manchild didn't say he loved me until we dated for a year. I knew he did, but I was not ready to hear it too soon. Anyway, he confessed he loved me from the first time we met, and you know, the feeling was mutual. Except neither of us knew it was love then. That's because it was lust and infatuation. Those things can turn into love over time when you get to know someone

Richie Waves

He might just be a socially awkward penguin who hates himself now for going too far.

Jopsy Pendragon

Or, he could be someone who believes smoking is sign of suicidal tendencies and is trying to help.

There's a very lonely late-middle-aged woman that strolls my urban neighborhood. She's clearly a little touched-in-the-head... harmless/sweet, but she's a black-hole of "need". Pass too close and you get sucked in. She fawns, she gushes, she reaches out and awkwardly touches people in a grandmotherly kind of way. I see her trap people and watch them squirm trying to extricate themselves without being insultingly rude. Others just pretend she isn't there.

There's plenty of other lonely people in the neighborhood too. People who would probably love a little attention, but for some reason she, and they aren't interested in spending time together. :-/

Phoebe Avro

You should have asked him if he had a big dick ^^

Tranquility

I think most of us hope and wish for that. I know I really really want this guy to have only the best intentions and she gives him a chance and they turn out to be perfect for each other. But unfortunately, reality has beaten me down too much. I'm overly cautious. I take the safe path all too often even if taking a risk could have huge benefits.

I feel bad for pancake and for the guy. He probably does hate himself now. And it sucks for pancake that being cautious and not giving this guy a chance is the safer option.

pancake

Yah...
I feel bad for me too.

There is pretty much nothing I need more than to star in my own romantic comedy chick flick moment. I hope this wasn't it

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Amity Slade

I wouldn't mind being that situation at all, with a man suddenly showing up professing my beauty and his love for me in the first two sentences he ever spoke to me ...

... As long as I get to pick the man beforehand.

Jahar Aabye

Leaving aside the obviously ridiculous statement about women having it easy, I also disagree with the first part. If I were in that situation, amd a woman came up to me and said that, I'd be kinda creeped out. I've never hsd anything exactly like that happen, although I did have an ex-girlfriend's friend's roomate flirt with me in the most blatant, inexperienced, and inappropriate manner a long time ago (I don't think I need to tell most women that offering to walk a man home "because it might be dangerous" when his girlfriend is in in the next room is a really stupid thing to do). Sure, if it's clear that she's inexperienced and doesn't know any better, it might be kinda cute, but....

The "I've been watching you" part and the "I love you" part were really inappropriate and kndicate that the person really has very little experience with romantic situations and very little understanding of things like personal boundaries or other people's comfort levels. So if a woman did that, I'd worry that she'd have serious difficulty accepting boundaries and limits in a relationship, which is bad enough. When a man does that, it implies very strongly that he may not accept No as an answer.

And that ties into one reason why women do not have it easier. It's a lot easier for a man to make a woman stop if she won't accept No for an answer than it is for a woman to make a man stop if he won't. For example, try imagining how you would feel in this scenario if the woman who said that to you was 6 inches taller and 60 pounds heavier than you.

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He pulled a Captain Ahab and Jaharpwn'ed her. - Trout

Ron Jorgensen

I agree with the first sentence. Men don't have as much to fear if they are approached that way. I have had a women approach me in a similar manner a few times and we were able to have a lot of fun as long as it lasted. Before they found a new infatuation.

Ron Jorgensen

LOL you are such a romantic...

Ron Jorgensen

Love at first sight I can believe in. "know I love you" without getting to know you better is a little over the top. But I don't sense anything threatening in this, just maybe an unpracticed attempt to hook up. i.e. his buddies always brag about how they come on to women, so his desires finally overcame his inhibitions and he gave it a shot. Too bad if he is sincere, he could be a nice, but shy guy. There are lots of those in the world. It is really hard for some people to come out of their shell.

If he looked interesting otherwise, it couldn't hurt to invite him to have lunch with you and a friend, if you see him again.

Best wishes...

Jahar Aabye

It's not like he did anything that particularly gives her any reason to think that he would be someone worth seeing. Didn't introduce himself, didn't tell her anything about himself. He only talked about how he'd seen her several times, told her that she had pretty eyes (and, ah, you usually have to get close to someone to notice that), and then professed his love for her.

So at best maybe he's harmless and shy, but he also sounds a little bit obsessed. And he demonstrates that he doesn't really seem to understand basic social norms regarding appropriate behavior. And he was clearly not considering how his actions would make her feel.

Now, I am definitely not an expert on what women want (I am rather adept at the Art of 1001 Ways to Make A Woman Scream In Frustration And Storm Out Of The Room), but I am fairly certain that among the things that situationally-inappropriate behavior and lack of consideration for how she feels are two really big turn-offs for most women, even if they're not interpreted as being kinda creepy (which this guy was).

Ultimately it'snsillynto suggest that a woman should go and do something if she feels very uncomfortable about it. Maybe he's a shy guy who is very nice and she's missing out on a great relationship. Maybe. But really, even in the best possible scenario, how big of a loss is that? On the other hand, if the guy really is the interpersonally-challenged, obsessive person that he came across as being, especially if he's the type who won't take no for an answer (or just won't even understand when she's saying no)...well then yes, it probably could hurt, a lot, to go on a date with him.

Eva Ryan

Well, to be truthful, the definition of "Love" is subjective. What love is to one person may be just infatuation to another... which, I think applies in this case.

BTW: Pancake... uh, what do your eyes really look like? Are they as beautiful as the gentleman said they were?

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ElyHynes Elysium

@EvaRyanSL is so FIC Humble follows her

pancake

Honestly? Not really, no.
I guess that's why this whole thing was odd to me.
Perhaps some ladies get random compliments on the street and declarations of love, but I sport the average over worked stressed out middle aged soccer mom look on my best days.

ETA - that's not a woe is me. No hugging! Just putting the incident in context.

Nadia

There was a guy I worked with. Giant flirt. But, he could always bring a smile. Even when I know I wasn't at my best (jeans, sneakers, cap, maybe lipstick at most), he'd pop up and say something like, "Damn, you look fantastic, just makes my heart got pitter patter." No matter how shitty I felt or my day had been, I had to smile. "Liar, but thank you!"

So, the eye thing wouldn't freak me out. Even the "I've seen ya a few times." For me, it's all about the "love." Still not freaked, but that word upon first meeting would've ruined it for me.

bubblesort

That is creepy. I'd be careful around that guy, pancake.

Flowers are great for valentines day like what you did, but I don't give flowers to women I care about anymore. I have a long line of experiences where I give a girl I'm dating a flower just because I care and they get all suspicious like I'm up to something or they are disappointed that I don't have some kind of elaborate love poetry explanation along with the flower (if I had love poetry for them I would give them that instead of the flower). I never gave one to a stranger, it was always at least 3 or 4 dates in to the relationship, if not more. It can be fun to watch them try to figure out what kind of mischief I'm up to when I'm not, but sometimes they invent something in their heads and that is a lot more trouble than it's worth. The women I date all seem to be much happier with chocolates, so I just give chocolates and not flowers now. Chocolate is less emotionally charged than flowers, I think.

Maybe I just need to find more emotionally stable women to date who don't get stupid at the first sight of a pretty blossom.