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Old 12-20-2017, 11:23 PM   #1 (permalink)
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A Topic You ARENíT a Fucken Expert On?

So in the age of the internet where anyone with a search engine and an opinion can claim to be an expert on just about anything, what are you unapologetically NOT an expert on? Mine include:

- Geography. I have a decent memory but Iím just not spatially inclined I guess.
- House Plants and Gardening. I have the knowledge and a passing interest but Iíve killed every plant Iíve owned.
- Oral Sex. This Iím going to blame on an overactive gag reflex and TMJ that have prevented me from perfecting a technique that produces results.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:27 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:30 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I don't think I'm an expert on anything; I know a lot of stuff that other people don't, and vice versa. Do people really Google stuff to pretend they knew it? Wouldn't it be.. obvious?
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:30 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:31 PM   #5 (permalink)
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I can discuss tentacle hentai with the best of them. Ask me to find Minnesota on a map? Not happening.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:32 PM   #6 (permalink)
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I can discuss tentacle hentai with the best of them. Ask me to find Minnesota on a map? Not happening.
It's like just below Canada.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:32 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deca! View Post
I don't think I'm an expert on anything; I know a lot of stuff that other people don't, and vice versa. Do people really Google stuff to pretend they knew it? Wouldn't it be.. obvious?
You must be new to the internet. Welcome.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:34 PM   #8 (permalink)
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People really do that? That's .. sad.



The gag reflex thing: have you tried acting like you're yawning? Apparently it suppresses the gag reflex muscles. Or so I've heard.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:37 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Just make sure you tell your dude that you're trying it. Yawning around his knob without warning may produce negative results and a soft dick.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:38 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deca! View Post
I don't think I'm an expert on anything; I know a lot of stuff that other people don't, and vice versa. Do people really Google stuff to pretend they knew it? Wouldn't it be.. obvious?
This will happen for the vast majority of questions you ask on the internet. Someone's just gonna google it for you.

At least for questions that have non-opinion-based answers, yes, it happens all the time.

It's not people pretending to know the answer - it's just, people using google for people that don't use google.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:39 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Yeah but like you said that's not pretending you know it and are passing it off as your own wisdom. That's why I'd think it'd be obvious, and why I'm surprised people try it. Like, girl, you didn't know Ghengis Khan had piles until you Googled that shit. Sit down.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:42 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Deca! View Post
Yeah but like you said that's not pretending you know it and are passing it off as your own wisdom. That's why I'd think it'd be obvious.
That usually works like "I know all about this topic blah blah, semi-correct jargon misused in numerous ways by the way here's a Wikipedia page explaining all I just told you, see I am smarts?!"

(I'm an expert on this topic...)
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:42 PM   #13 (permalink)
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So in the age of the internet where anyone with a search engine and an opinion can claim to be an expert on just about anything, what are you unapologetically NOT an expert on? Mine include:

- Geography. I have a decent memory but Iím just not spatially inclined I guess.
- House Plants and Gardening. I have the knowledge and a passing interest but Iíve killed every plant Iíve owned.
- Oral Sex. This Iím going to blame on an overactive gag reflex and TMJ that have prevented me from perfecting a technique that produces results.
I feel your pain on all of those!

To add to your list:

-I am a horrible presenter. It's my biggest weakness in my career.
-Cars. I know to put gas in and get oil changes every now and again. I felt like I learned something awesome when I learned how to check my oil!
-Sports. I don't watch sports and it's awkward when this comes up in social situations.
-Art. I love art, but have never been good at making my own.
-Graphics. I'm a programmer, and this is a big relative blind spot for me. I wish I was better at making my own clothing textures in SL in particular.... I can only do simple modifications to what someone else made.
-Cooking. I have mastered just a handful of things.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:43 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Free Xue View Post
That usually works like "I know all about this topic blah blah, semi-correct jargon misused in numerous ways by the way here's a Wikipedia page explaining all I just told you, see I am smarts?!"
Ah yes. I am familiar with people like that. Thanks!

I don't think I'm naive to the ways of the Interwebs, rather just naive about the fact that people really think they get away with that shit.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:44 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Adeon Writer View Post
When someone asks a quesion on the internet that could be easily googled, I will google it, and then answer them. That's not me pretending I knew the answer - that's just me googling something for someone else on the internet.

This will happen for the vast majority of questions you ask on the internet. Someone's just gonna google it for you.

At least for questions that have non-opinion-based answers.
There are also those who try to ďwinĒ arguments using google though. If you are having an argument about the longest unbroken poop or biggest ball of bellybutton lint someone will google it and pretend they just happened to know that. Or sometimes that they have some unverifiable first hand expertise. Or maybe I spend too much time on Reddit.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:50 PM   #16 (permalink)
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Math.

My bairn R no gudat math and I've tried to to give a shit and try to find it interesting but I just can't.

Cars, Computers, Others motivations, useful information....

I could write a book!!!!
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:50 PM   #17 (permalink)
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If you want a specific answer about stuff I definitely know jack shit about (since I'm waiting for my sleeping pills to kick in):

Like Troll, cooking. I like experimenting but I literally fucked up an idiot-proof recipe where you add one ingredient to a mix, so ..

Also like Troll, sports. Don't care for it except to watch bums in spandex. Sitting among thousands of people watching Team A throwing a ball through an apparatus so they can make Team B sad sounds like literal hell.

Languages. I know Irish and English and rudimentary French. I'm ok with that.

Complex trigonometry. Nope. And nope.
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Old 12-20-2017, 11:52 PM   #18 (permalink)
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Old 12-21-2017, 12:01 AM   #19 (permalink)
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Oh! those things in life that everyone acts like it's common knowledge or innate yet no one anywhere ever talks about but just expects you to know/know how to do.

I suck at those.
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Old 12-21-2017, 12:09 AM   #20 (permalink)
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When I use the words left or right, Iíve almost always quickly gone through an excercise in my head where Iíve mimicked writing with my right hand and making an L with the thumb of my left hand to make sure I pick the correct term. It makes no sense that I cannot just confidently say left or right.
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Old 12-21-2017, 12:11 AM   #21 (permalink)
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Also Iím simultaneously relieved and surprised no one has googled the longest unbroken poop. That was a gimme SLU, youíre slipping.
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Old 12-21-2017, 12:12 AM   #22 (permalink)
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I have almost no sense of direction. People who can tell what north is without a compass astound and annoy me.

YES I KNOW THE SUN TRICK, DOESN'T HELP.

EDIT TO ADD: working a clutch, seriously what kind of poly-rhythms do I need to know to not have a car die on me.
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Old 12-21-2017, 12:30 AM   #23 (permalink)
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Old 12-21-2017, 01:39 AM   #24 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pancake View Post
When I use the words left or right, Iíve almost always quickly gone through an excercise in my head where Iíve mimicked writing with my right hand and making an L with the thumb of my left hand to make sure I pick the correct term. It makes no sense that I cannot just confidently say left or right.
I am the same.. I have a really good sense of direction or should I say had, when I used to drive.. I could find my way anywhere
but left and right..
noooooo
I often have to say things like.. erm I meant the other right.

Math.. nope nope and nope.. I can count on my fingers .. and guestimate shit, I have incredible spatial/visual calculability (dunno english words for this) .. like what size tupperware the leftover curry will fit in.. or if something will fit through a door..
or how much clay will shrink.. etc..
but add, subtract, multiply divide etc.. no can do.
I am positively mathlexic.

I love to cook.. I am good enough at it.. but I cannot boil potatoes properly. They're always under or over.

I know absolutely nothing about baseball.. I always used to think that because it was an American sports, all the players were christian and the pitcher and catcher were making the sign of the cross and praying before each pitch..
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Old 12-21-2017, 02:08 AM   #25 (permalink)
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Left and right - same method that pancake describes, sometimes I am even moving my right hand as if I would write to make sure.

Geography, too - I don't know if the categories are worldwide the same, but when playing the classic Trivial Pursuit... blue questions were my nightmare. My standard answer was 'Saragossa Sea'.

History - I have a relatively good knowledge of historical events, the larger picture how and why certain things happened, and i know a lot of unimportant anecdotes or details, but I can't remember any dates or names. I have no idea which king ruled where and when.

Estimating numbers, weight, distances. anything in the bigger numbers - nope. Populations... I always have to look them up so i don't say something stupid (YES, google is your friend)
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