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Richie Waves · 03-29-2012, 12:24 PM

Quote:

The clergyman, in his 50s, told medical staff at Sheffield's Northern General Hospital that the accident was definitely not due to a sex game.

He had to undergo surgery to extract the spud from his backside, according to The Sun.

A&E nurse Trudi Watson said: 'He explained to me, quite sincerely, he had been hanging curtains naked in he kitchen when he fell backwards on to the kitchen table and on to a potato.

'But it's not for me to question his story.'

She went on to reveal other objects removed from people's derriére, including a cucumber, a Russian doll and a carnation.

Vicar hospitalised with potato up his bum | Metro.co.uk

They'd want to start putting warnings on potatoes..

I'm proud to bring you lot the important happenings from across the pond!

Zaida Gearbox · 03-29-2012, 12:27 PM

I have heard of some really weird things being found up somebody's butt, but a potato is a new one.

Baltha · 03-29-2012, 12:48 PM

So the Metro is now reduced to reporting on a Sun story from 2008 about an unnamed vicar from an unnamed church. British tabloid journalism at it's finest!

Vicar in casualty with spud stuck in backside | The Sun |News

Kara Spengler · 03-29-2012, 12:52 PM

Who in the world hangs curtains up while naked?

Or for that matter, manages to get *anything* up there by accidentally falling on it?

Kaimi Kyomoon · 03-29-2012, 03:11 PM

Who in the world makes this kind of thing public?

Twisted Pharaoh · 03-29-2012, 03:27 PM

Usual tabloid crap. They can be more imaginative than this:

Darnk Yun · 03-29-2012, 03:33 PM

well, how big was the potato? cuz, well, couldn't he just.... you know.... poop it out? I mean potatoes just seem to be like big poops.... was it an idaho?!

and yeah, he "fell on the potato"...

Darkley · 03-29-2012, 03:35 PM

i remember this story, its old

I have loads of 'up the bum' stories if anyone is interested, i used to work at a hospital, taking photos of unusual things....

Ann Otoole · 03-29-2012, 03:39 PM

i'm sorry. are you saying a 3 inch diameter turd is normal?

Darnk Yun · 03-29-2012, 03:41 PM

LOL no, I was just being stupid Xd

*thinks about it*

WOAH!! that's a big potato!

Lucifer Baphomet · 03-29-2012, 03:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darkley

i remember this story, its old

I have loads of 'up the bum' stories if anyone is interested, i used to work at a hospital, taking photos of unusual things....

The ones that always made me cringe were the lightbulbs.

Twisted Pharaoh · 03-29-2012, 03:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ann Otoole

i'm sorry. are you saying a 3 inch diameter turd is normal?

Lucifer Baphomet · 03-29-2012, 03:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ann Otoole

i'm sorry. are you saying a 3 inch diameter turd is normal?

New potatoes are turd sized.

Darnk Yun · 03-29-2012, 03:45 PM

I ASKED HOW BIG IT WAS!!!

I DIDN'T KNOW!!! I DIDN'T KNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW *cries hysterically*

Wildefire Walcott · 03-29-2012, 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darkley

I have loads of 'up the bum' stories if anyone is interested

Listening...

**Aliselia Aeon** · 03-29-2012, 03:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucifer Baphomet

The ones that always made me cringe were the lightbulbs.

We used to get the occasional light bulb. *shudders* That always made me cringe. We had LOTS of shot glasses, various veg, and other assorted stuff, but the light bulbs worried me more than anything else I ran into.

Darkley · 03-29-2012, 03:57 PM

there were loads of lightbulbs, various fruits and vegetables plus

snooker balls
and the worst? a guy was housesitting, and got an wooden african statue stuck up there, got it surgically removed but needed it back, so he could put it back onto the coffee table so the family wouldnt notice what he did

Errafel Eccleston · 03-29-2012, 04:00 PM

Silicone toys can tear somewhat easily if they get a nick or scratch on them. I wonder how many partial toys have to be removed annually?

**Bard Jameson** · 03-29-2012, 04:20 PM

Well you see doctor, I was making a Chef's Salad and had all the ingredients out on the kitchen table. Now I always prepare meals in the nude because my religious beliefs dictate that we be naked as God made us during important tasks of daily life, so as to remind ourselves of our humble beginnings.

Anyway, I had been mixing the vinaigrette and got a bit of olive oil on my hands, which I spread over the cucumber in preparation for slicing, which again is a ritual practice, in which we follow the instructions in the Book of FlapDoodle, Chapter 12, Verses 9 and 10, which read:

9. "And so did GabbleWrath take hold of the hearty vegetable and did place oil upon it, and spake the words, 10. "Damn, that is one fine cuke!"

So, just then the light over the kitchen table went out. I went to the pantry, got another bulb, and climbed up on the kitchen chair. But I couldn't reach the overhead lamp, so I climbed up on the table and as I did my foot slipped on some oil that had spilled, and I fell down hard on my nether regions and well, that's how the cucumber got there.

All perfectly innocent and accidental...I assure you.

Baltha · 03-29-2012, 04:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bard Jameson

Well you see doctor, I was making a Chef's Salad and had all the ingredients out on the kitchen table. Now I always prepare meals in the nude because my religious beliefs dictate that we be naked as God made us during important tasks of daily life, so as to remind ourselves of our humble beginnings.

Anyway, I had been mixing the vinaigrette and got a bit of olive oil on my hands, which I spread over the cucumber in preparation for slicing, which again is a ritual practice, in which we follow the instructions in the Book of FlapDoodle, Chapter 12, Verses 9 and 10, which read:

9. "And so did GabbleWrath take hold of the hearty vegetable and did place oil upon it, and spake the words, 10. "Damn, that is one fine cuke!"

So, just then the light over the kitchen table went out. I went to the pantry, got another bulb, and climbed up on the kitchen chair. But I couldn't reach the overhead lamp, so I climbed up on the table and as I did my foot slipped on some oil that had spilled, and I fell down hard on my nether regions and well, that's how the cucumber got there.

All perfectly innocent and accidental...I assure you.

That excuse is way too polished for you to have just made it up

Teeny Leviathan · 03-29-2012, 06:51 PM

Overheard in the emergency room...

Quote:

Doctor: The target area is only two centimeters wide. It's a small thermal exhaust port, right below the taint. The shaft leads directly to the lower gastrointestinal system. A precise hit will start a chain reaction which could destroy his bum.

Intern: That's impossible, even for a computer.

Creepy Doctor: It's not impossible. I used to bull's-eye my brown eye with 10 ounce russets back home. Its not much bigger than two centimeters.

Magic Mournblade · 03-30-2012, 06:05 AM

They're up in my bum! - YouTube

Darkley · 03-30-2012, 06:19 AM

Im going to tell you a story about a RL friend of mine, when i was about 15, my friend (and I do mean friend, not me btw) came round my house in a panic, she had been 'experimenting' and got a twix finger stuck up there (front of house, not back of house) and wanted me to come with her to the docs to get it fished out.

I still, to this day cant look at a twix without sniggering

**Aliselia Aeon** · 03-30-2012, 07:05 AM

I remember a doctor that kept a shampoo bottle that he had removed from somebody's bum. He said it was a trophy.

Markubis · 03-30-2012, 07:21 AM

This threads headline needs an award.

03-29-2012, 03:33 PM	#7 (permalink)
Darnk Yun 01001100 01001111 0100110 01000011 01101111 01101111 01101100 0100001 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Location! Location! Posts: 4,369 My Mood: SL Join Date: '06 Business: Darnkeyes! Blog Entries: 1	well, how big was the potato? cuz, well, couldn't he just.... you know.... poop it out? I mean potatoes just seem to be like big poops.... was it an idaho?! and yeah, he "fell on the potato"... __________________ Ahaha, such a simpleton. It'z so much fun playing jokez on you. I waz only here to see how she waz doing, but I had fun while I waz at it. So long, Sere, au revoir, mon ami! Pleaze dream of moi every night! Oui! ~ Harle http://leechmouth.deviantart.com/

03-29-2012, 03:35 PM	#8 (permalink)
Darkley I am Legion Filthy Lucre Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: lahndahn Posts: 4,737 My Mood: SL Join Date: 2007 Business: Guerilla Avatar Blog Entries: 2 Awards: 1	i remember this story, its old I have loads of 'up the bum' stories if anyone is interested, i used to work at a hospital, taking photos of unusual things.... __________________ Prickle Poses Available inworld and on the marketplace

03-29-2012, 04:20 PM	#19 (permalink)
Bard Jameson Situationally Obtuse *SLU Supporter* Avec Chapeau Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 9,416 My Mood: SL Join Date: 1/27/2008 Blog Entries: 2 Awards: 2	Well you see doctor, I was making a Chef's Salad and had all the ingredients out on the kitchen table. Now I always prepare meals in the nude because my religious beliefs dictate that we be naked as God made us during important tasks of daily life, so as to remind ourselves of our humble beginnings. Anyway, I had been mixing the vinaigrette and got a bit of olive oil on my hands, which I spread over the cucumber in preparation for slicing, which again is a ritual practice, in which we follow the instructions in the Book of FlapDoodle, Chapter 12, Verses 9 and 10, which read: 9. "And so did GabbleWrath take hold of the hearty vegetable and did place oil upon it, and spake the words, 10. "Damn, that is one fine cuke!" So, just then the light over the kitchen table went out. I went to the pantry, got another bulb, and climbed up on the kitchen chair. But I couldn't reach the overhead lamp, so I climbed up on the table and as I did my foot slipped on some oil that had spilled, and I fell down hard on my nether regions and well, that's how the cucumber got there. All perfectly innocent and accidental...I assure you. __________________ -- Baratia Island - Come Enjoy Your Second Life with Us! Home to Atia Creations Skins, Makeup and More - Come see what The New Girl is making Check our Event Calendar and come join the fun!

03-30-2012, 07:21 AM	#25 (permalink)
Markubis Socially Distorted Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: New Hampshire Posts: 2,111 My Mood: SL Join Date: 4/15/2006	This threads headline needs an award. __________________ I'm ahead of my time, but only by a week. - Too Much Joy

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03-29-2012, 12:27 PM	#2 (permalink)
Zaida Gearbox Senior Member I finally got it all together, but now I forget where I put it. Join Date: Sep 2010 Location: Steelhead, Winterfell, New Babbage Posts: 3,767	I have heard of some really weird things being found up somebody's butt, but a potato is a new one.

03-29-2012, 03:11 PM	#5 (permalink)
Kaimi Kyomoon Persistent Participant Kaw-EE-mee Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: Earth, Early 21st century Posts: 2,668 My Mood: Business: Kaimi's	Who in the world makes this kind of thing public?

03-29-2012, 03:27 PM	#6 (permalink)
Twisted Pharaoh Junior Member Along with Athena, move also your hand Join Date: Feb 2010 Posts: 2,977 My Mood: SL Join Date: Yesterday	Usual tabloid crap. They can be more imaginative than this:

03-29-2012, 03:39 PM	#9 (permalink)
Ann Otoole Senior Member Join Date: Oct 2008 Posts: 16,374	i'm sorry. are you saying a 3 inch diameter turd is normal?

03-29-2012, 03:41 PM	#10 (permalink)
Darnk Yun 01001100 01001111 0100110 01000011 01101111 01101111 01101100 0100001 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Location! Location! Posts: 4,369 My Mood: SL Join Date: '06 Business: Darnkeyes! Blog Entries: 1	LOL no, I was just being stupid Xd thinks about it WOAH!! that's a big potato!

03-29-2012, 03:45 PM	#14 (permalink)
Darnk Yun 01001100 01001111 0100110 01000011 01101111 01101111 01101100 0100001 Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Location! Location! Posts: 4,369 My Mood: SL Join Date: '06 Business: Darnkeyes! Blog Entries: 1	I ASKED HOW BIG IT WAS!!! I DIDN'T KNOW!!! I DIDN'T KNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWW cries hysterically

03-29-2012, 03:57 PM	#17 (permalink)
Darkley I am Legion Filthy Lucre Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: lahndahn Posts: 4,737 My Mood: SL Join Date: 2007 Business: Guerilla Avatar Blog Entries: 2 Awards: 1	there were loads of lightbulbs, various fruits and vegetables plus snooker balls and the worst? a guy was housesitting, and got an wooden african statue stuck up there, got it surgically removed but needed it back, so he could put it back onto the coffee table so the family wouldnt notice what he did

03-29-2012, 04:00 PM	#18 (permalink)
Errafel Eccleston . Join Date: Apr 2011 Posts: 318 My Mood: SL Join Date: Nov 25, 2005 Client: All the griefs	Silicone toys can tear somewhat easily if they get a nick or scratch on them. I wonder how many partial toys have to be removed annually?

03-30-2012, 06:19 AM	#23 (permalink)
Darkley I am Legion Filthy Lucre Join Date: Jun 2008 Location: lahndahn Posts: 4,737 My Mood: SL Join Date: 2007 Business: Guerilla Avatar Blog Entries: 2 Awards: 1	Im going to tell you a story about a RL friend of mine, when i was about 15, my friend (and I do mean friend, not me btw) came round my house in a panic, she had been 'experimenting' and got a twix finger stuck up there (front of house, not back of house) and wanted me to come with her to the docs to get it fished out. I still, to this day cant look at a twix without sniggering

03-30-2012, 07:05 AM	#24 (permalink)
Aliselia Aeon Senior Member *SLU Supporter* Stolen Child Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Here Posts: 12,521 My Mood: SL Join Date: October 27, 2007 Client: at the moment, Nirans Blog Entries: 3	I remember a doctor that kept a shampoo bottle that he had removed from somebody's bum. He said it was a trophy.

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