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Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:21 PM

Worst zombie story ever... there are only 2 zombies in it (Lazarus and Jesus) and they don't go on killing sprees.

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:23 PM

Well, according to many here, God is responsible for many deaths.

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:24 PM

Please keep this discussion to the Zombie related aspects Perkins.

It would have been a far better story if Danny Boyle had written it.

Asher Bertrand · 08-27-2008, 08:25 PM

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:26 PM

And why are you groaning.....

Are you a Zombie?

Anyone who groans on this thread will be decapitated before they spread the infection

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucifer Baphomet

Please keep this discussion to the Zombie related aspects Perkins.

It would have been a far better story if Danny Boyle had written it.

This isn't fair, anything bad I throw back at you about the devil you will take as a compliment.

Macphisto Angelus · 08-27-2008, 08:28 PM

I sense a sequel to Shaun of the Dead in this somewhere...

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucifer Baphomet

And why are you groaning.....

Are you a Zombie?

Anyone who groans on this thread will be decapitated before they spread the infection

There. I laughed to.

I grunted because if Jesus killed more people, or anyone, maybe people would respect him more.

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:30 PM

I wonder if Peter and Thomas just walked him around for a few days like in Weekend At Bernie's.

Bard Jameson · 08-27-2008, 08:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beau Perkins

if Jesus killed more people, or anyone, maybe people would respect him more.

Yeah, he shoulda shanked some of those asshole money lenders in the temple. That woulda got him some street cred.

Adam Zaius · 08-27-2008, 08:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beau Perkins

Well, according to many here, God is responsible for many deaths.

25 billion served.

io Kukulcan · 08-27-2008, 08:33 PM

I bet it was hard for Roman legionnaires to destroy zombies back then.

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bard Jameson

Yeah, he shoulda shanked some of those asshole money lenders in the temple. That woulda got him some street cred.

YouTube - Kung-Fu Jesus

Asher Bertrand · 08-27-2008, 08:39 PM

I always thought the Jesus story was more vampiric than zombie, what with the drinking of bludz and all. But I might be a bit biased.

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:41 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Asher Bertrand

I always thought the Jesus story was more vampiric than zombie, what with the drinking of bludz and all. But I might be a bit biased.

Good thing Anne Rice didn't write it then. She had 3 good books in her and that was it.

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:42 PM

No really lets get serious. I know you are all having fun but this is getting personal.

You see I know Jesus personally. When I was like 20, and driving around the country with dead heads. I met Jesus one weekend in Myrtle Beach. We discussed life and love, and and then he drove off into the sunset with a bunch of guys headed north to St. Louis.

This is a true story by the way...well we called him Jesus. He was a dark Jewish guy with a long beard.

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 08:46 PM

James Cameron's input could have helped too..

YouTube - Terminator (jesus parody)

Asher Bertrand · 08-27-2008, 08:51 PM

Drove off into the sunset? There goes my theory

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 08:56 PM

Jesus always wins.

YouTube - Jesus vs. Hitler

Maureen Boccaccio · 08-27-2008, 08:59 PM

I am new to this, but was that a Godwin?

Lucifer Baphomet · 08-27-2008, 09:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beau Perkins

Jesus always wins.

YouTube - Jesus vs. Hitler

another of his classic fights..

YouTube - Jesus vs. Satan Smack-Down

Richie Waves · 08-27-2008, 09:02 PM

I smoked a fat one with Jesus last year at Oxygen festival.. Bogart motherfucker...

Beau Perkins · 08-27-2008, 09:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucifer Baphomet

another of his classic fights..

Ok, this thread sucks now. You just took all the funny out for me.

It's only funny for me when he wins damn you!!

Richie Waves · 08-27-2008, 09:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beau Perkins

Ok, this thread sucks now. You just took all the funny out for me.

It's only funny for me when he wins damn you!!

The man died nailed to a cross ffs... get used to it...

Malachi · 08-27-2008, 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Beau Perkins

You see I know Jesus personally. When I was like 20, and driving around the country with dead heads. I met Jesus one weekend in Myrtle Beach. We discussed life and love, and and then he drove off into the sunset with a bunch of guys headed north to St. Louis.

I had a similar experience: I was driving home early Sunday morning through Bakersfield, listening to gospel music on the colored radio station. And the preacher said, "you know you always have the Lord by your side". And I was so pleased to be informed of this that I ran twenty red lights in his honor. Thank you Jesus, thank you Lord.

08-27-2008, 08:21 PM	#1 (permalink)
Lucifer Baphomet Pampers Io Zenophile Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Darkmere Posts: 11,333 Business: Radio Free Darkmere Awards: 1	Why the New Testament Sucks Worst zombie story ever... there are only 2 zombies in it (Lazarus and Jesus) and they don't go on killing sprees. __________________

08-27-2008, 08:23 PM	#2 (permalink)
Beau Perkins Is a sickly peach color I love God and I love Guns. Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: CT Posts: 7,185 SL Join Date: 12/24/2003 My Mood:	Well, according to many here, God is responsible for many deaths. __________________ Living is easy with eyes closed Misunderstanding all you see It's getting hard to be someone, but it all works out It doesn't matter much to me -John Lennon.

08-27-2008, 08:25 PM	#4 (permalink)
Asher Bertrand Dead Guy Creaking watermelons Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 6,360 Blog Entries: 2 My Mood:	__________________ Have you ever wanted to be a cock, or perhaps look just like one?

08-27-2008, 08:28 PM	#7 (permalink)
Macphisto Angelus Is a bastage! It puts the lotion on it's skin!! Join Date: May 2008 Location: Cali Posts: 3,002 SL Join Date: 10-21-2004 My Mood:	I sense a sequel to Shaun of the Dead in this somewhere... __________________ My blog If life is just a joke, why aren't we laughing?

08-27-2008, 09:02 PM	#22 (permalink)
Richie Waves 50/50 Is Three apples Tall Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Between Iraq and Israel Posts: 8,318 SL Join Date: 27/06/2005	I smoked a fat one with Jesus last year at Oxygen festival.. Bogart motherfucker... __________________ My lastfm Hello, I'm a recovering crackhead and this is my retarded sister. Can we have some welfare please? -Dennis

08-27-2008, 08:24 PM	#3 (permalink)
Lucifer Baphomet Pampers Io Zenophile Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Darkmere Posts: 11,333 Business: Radio Free Darkmere Awards: 1	Please keep this discussion to the Zombie related aspects Perkins. It would have been a far better story if Danny Boyle had written it.

08-27-2008, 08:26 PM	#5 (permalink)
Lucifer Baphomet Pampers Io Zenophile Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Darkmere Posts: 11,333 Business: Radio Free Darkmere Awards: 1	And why are you groaning..... Are you a Zombie? Anyone who groans on this thread will be decapitated before they spread the infection

08-27-2008, 08:30 PM	#9 (permalink)
Beau Perkins Is a sickly peach color I love God and I love Guns. Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: CT Posts: 7,185 SL Join Date: 12/24/2003 My Mood:	I wonder if Peter and Thomas just walked him around for a few days like in Weekend At Bernie's.

08-27-2008, 08:33 PM	#12 (permalink)
io Kukulcan i don't know differential weathering Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: the wasatch front Posts: 1,747 SL Join Date: 04/2006 My Mood:	I bet it was hard for Roman legionnaires to destroy zombies back then.

08-27-2008, 08:39 PM	#14 (permalink)
Asher Bertrand Dead Guy Creaking watermelons Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 6,360 Blog Entries: 2 My Mood:	I always thought the Jesus story was more vampiric than zombie, what with the drinking of bludz and all. But I might be a bit biased.

08-27-2008, 08:42 PM	#16 (permalink)
Beau Perkins Is a sickly peach color I love God and I love Guns. Join Date: Nov 2007 Location: CT Posts: 7,185 SL Join Date: 12/24/2003 My Mood:	No really lets get serious. I know you are all having fun but this is getting personal. You see I know Jesus personally. When I was like 20, and driving around the country with dead heads. I met Jesus one weekend in Myrtle Beach. We discussed life and love, and and then he drove off into the sunset with a bunch of guys headed north to St. Louis. This is a true story by the way...well we called him Jesus. He was a dark Jewish guy with a long beard.

08-27-2008, 08:51 PM	#18 (permalink)
Asher Bertrand Dead Guy Creaking watermelons Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 6,360 Blog Entries: 2 My Mood:	Drove off into the sunset? There goes my theory

08-27-2008, 08:59 PM	#20 (permalink)
Maureen Boccaccio Lucky Lady I haz status? Join Date: Apr 2008 Location: Washington, DC area Posts: 6,778 SL Join Date: 2/23/2008 My Mood:	I am new to this, but was that a Godwin?

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