Void

I do that too... and I'm told my voice loses all tone and I speak in short, precise, active sentences (unlike my normal ramble). If I'm ready to commit violence, I drop into the "command" tone (every child recognizes it).

hell, I do that as a matter of course... military upbringing, along with some great creative instruction by a very Irish cousin... not that I can't play nice at parties, but no one has ever made the mistake of calling me a "lady"... twice

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- These eyes can do more than see

Jahar Aabye

Usually reactive, irrationally reactive. When I can respond rationally, it's usually either avoidant (in a good sense, as in "this shit isn't worth worrying about) or direct.

Unlike a lot of people, I'm not scared about how I might react. Reactive anger for me means yelling and maybe hitting inanimate objects. I suppose the yelling part might be scary to watch, but I'm never violent when I'm angry in the reactive sense.

When I'm being Direct, I don't hit inanimate objects. Usualy I don't hit animate objects either, unless I have no choice. I've only actually been in one situation where I think I might have been willing to kill someone, but his death certificate would have had to list his cause of death as being "tried to rape the wrong person's sister."

Sometimes when I've tried the avoidance thing, it's ended badly. Someone assumes that I'm a pushover and they just keep pushing until they cross a line, usually by hitting me or coming at me like they're going to hit me. That does provoke a direct reaction, and like I said, I don't hit inanimate objects when I react directly. It's not a line that someone could cross accidentally, and I'm fully aware of and in control of that reaction. And like I said, that tends to happen only when I've been reluctant to react and tried to avoid causing a confrontation.

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He pulled a Captain Ahab and Jaharpwn'ed her. - Trout

Isabeau Imako

I'm familiar with all these types of anger

One thing that has, and still does set me off into a complete rage is if I feel cornered, i.e. when I'm not able to leave a situation. When someone tells you they need to step out and cool down, you should believe them. Also, when people insist, or won't take no for an answer.

I'm usually pretty calm, and I'm better as I grow older but, sometimes...

Raindrop Drinkwater

I'm a pressure-cooker. When I go off, it's really not pretty. otherwise I'm generally avoidant.

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Seyla Warden

Are you me?

It doesn't help that I've lived with authority figures (parents) most of my adult life who are very direct or reactionary themselves, and treat any complaints or anger I may have as an excuse to get angry themselves; it's always all my fault.

So now I just avoid them, which leads to its own problems ('you're always in your room/you're always on the computer/why aren't you talking' blah blah) but it ends up being the lesser of two evils...

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Seyla Warden

It's kind of like Avoidant to the extreme; you just... sever ties. I do it too. What's the point in arguing? It just makes things worse. So the other option is to completely remove yourself from the situation and ensure it can't happen again.

Asher Bertrand

It's not avoidant if you're protecting yourself. No one should have to take abuse. There are times when there might be a benefit to staying and confronting, and there are times when there's little to gain and cutting your losses is the wiser move.

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Seyla Warden

Maybe. It makes for a pretty lonely existence though.

Rose Alba Karuna

If I had done this earlier in my life I could have saved myself a butt load of heart ache and abuse.

I'm probably a combination of avoidant and direct. I really choose my battles carefully. I don't have as much time or energy to expend on anger as you young whipper snappers.

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Aliselia Aeon

Do you understand that there are people out there in the world that aren't abusive? There are healthier (no one is perfectly healthy psychologically) people to associate with. One doesn't have to accept abuse in order to not be alone. That is a myth often taught to the abused by the abusers.

Everyone has arguments, but not everyone abuses. They are different things.

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"Push 100cc of Social Skills, stat!" ~Casey Pelous

Beezle Warburton

Or a trap people with really crap self-esteem fall into.

There's a world full of non-abusive, half-way reasonable people out there.

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Jager Xeltentat

Unfortunately, I tend to be the reactive type of angry. I'm very confident and at times, over analyze things which makes me perceive most slights as real. This may be a fortunate but usually after I cool down with a clear head, I rethink and see if I reacted wrongly or not. By then, it depends on the other if they're willing to hear me out if I was wrong.

I am working to be the more direct type of angry if I have to be angry at all. It's constructive but it is hard because I'm the personality type that calls people out on their BS if wronged and can be confrontational. I was raised to always stand up for myself and not look the other way if something terribly wrong is happening around me. So it's two "struggles" here: Learning to deal with conflict the right way and learning to let less serious issues slide.

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Mercedes

All of the above.

It really depends on what it is that made my angry. I can be aloof and seethe quietly. I am infamous for my cutting sarcasm when I am really ticked off. I can be passive aggressive most definitely. If I am really pushed to the edge I can leave scorched Earth in my path. The good news is I have a very long fuse and I don't fly off the handle at situations and/or people who don't deserve that kind of emotion

Richie Waves

I've been known to go nuclear.