Originally Posted by edith zimmerman

The Hot Guy

I was at a party when this super-hot guy came up to me. He was like seven feet tall with retardedly huge muscles and super-tight clothes. Inwardly, I was like “Oh my god!” but outwardly I was cool.

“Excuse me, miss,” he said, smiling. “Can I buy you a drink?”

“Totally!” I said. “What kind of drink can I get?”

“Uh, whatever you want,” he said.

“I’ll have four whiskeys in one glass,” I said to the bartender.

“Whoa,” the guy said.

“Don’t worry,” I said. “I’m not going to drink it all.”

“Huh?” the guy said, giving me a quizzical look.

I laughed. “It’s for washing out my cuts,” I said, picking up the glass and heading toward the bathroom. “Be right back!” Omg I was going to have a boyfriend finally!