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| | #77 (permalink) |
| mmm . . . beef chow mein ![]() ![]()
Can haz biskit?
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 434
My Mood: SL Join Date: 3/24/2009 | And Jessie will never be the same.
__________________ "Werewolf, n. A wolf that was once, or is sometimes, a man. All werewolves are of evil disposition, having assumed a bestial form to gratify a beastial appetite, but some, transformed by sorcery, are as humane and is consistent with an acquired taste for human flesh." Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary |
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| | #78 (permalink) | |
| Oncorhynchus mykiss ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Incomprehensible gibberish
| Quote:
Essentially a summons and complaint, followed by an answer is just both sides showing up for the fight. They are important documents, but now the real litigation can begin. | |
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| 2 Users Agreed: |
| | #79 (permalink) | |
| Long Distance Sailor ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Ribald Lewdness
Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 3,751
My Mood: SL Join Date: January 27, 2007 | Quote:
You stand...look him or her right in the eye and say "Good morning your honor, Susanne Pascale for the plaintiff [or defense or whatever]. We're ready." "We're ready is the legal equivilent of "Lock and load" or the gunfight at the OK corrall or 20 paces at dawn. Those of you who have not experienced this cannot imagine the adrenalin rush one gets from saying the 2 simple words "We're ready." Sooz
__________________ Nothing sickens me more than the closed door of a library - Barbara Tuchman | |
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| | #80 (permalink) | |
| Just trying to get by ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Milana's dom and Rhonda's
babydoll
Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Detroit, Mi.
Posts: 16,810
My Mood: SL Join Date: 5/4/2007 Blog Entries: 15 | Quote:
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| | #81 (permalink) | |
| Oncorhynchus mykiss ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Incomprehensible gibberish
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Then, the flip side is when the case is over - assuming you have won, you take your client out for a meal, thank them for the opportunity, discuss what happens next, then go home and crash into bed for 3 days. I'm not sure I'm even safe to drive home after a tough trial. Edit: and to agree with Sooz, as much as I love those legal drama tv shows, they are total fantasy. Nothing like that EVER happens, and any show about my exicitng litigation practice would just be an hour of me sitting at a computer reading cases or typing a brief, and the occasional phone call. It is not a spectator sport, despite what Boston Legal would have you believe. (Also, I'm uglier than William Shatner, and I don't have mad cow disease) | |
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| | #82 (permalink) | |
| Long Distance Sailor ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Ribald Lewdness
Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 3,751
My Mood: SL Join Date: January 27, 2007 | Quote:
Sooz | |
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| | #83 (permalink) |
| Emergency Mustelid ![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 1,084
| I get enough adrenaline when I say "ship it"* ... and then it's too late to catch any more bugs before the customer sees it. There's no way I could handle adding an adversarial relationship into the mix. * Sorta... the release sign-off process isn't a spectator sport either. |
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| | #85 (permalink) | |
| Oncorhynchus mykiss ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Incomprehensible gibberish
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It's not easy. It's the most stressful thing I've ever done. But it's still the biggest rush I've ever had. | |
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| | #86 (permalink) |
| Long Distance Sailor ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Ribald Lewdness
Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: Los Angeles
Posts: 3,751
My Mood: SL Join Date: January 27, 2007 | I don't know why I am reminded of this story, but I am. One time we were putting a settlement on the record in court. Opposing counsel cut a humongous fart!! Everyone ignored it. then he let another one. The clerk started to snicker and the japenese american judge looked startled like "WTF???". When I think something is funny and its inappropriate to laugh, I bite the inside of my mouth to keep from laughing. He let yet another fart and said simply "Sorry your honor, too much salad for lunch today." the clerk hid her face behind her desk, the judge was STRUGGLING to maintain his composure and I had to get a wad of tissue for the blood that was starting to trickle out my mouth. We moved on. Sooz |
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| | #87 (permalink) | |
| Senior Member ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 7,611
My Mood: | Quote:
Doesn't she know your wife knows how to use a gun? | |
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| | #88 (permalink) | |
| Oncorhynchus mykiss ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]() ![]()
Incomprehensible gibberish
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lol at Sooz's story. I've never had anything like that happen. But I was representing the plaintiff in a breach case once and the defendant was a Russian guy with a pretty heavy accent. I just crucified the guy on the stand because he kept lying. I mean real whoppers. So every time I caught him in a lie, I had all the documents to prove he was lying right there in my briefcase, and I would grab the right one and stick it under his nose. I just demolished the guy. When his attorney stood up, he said, "Your Honor, as you know my client is Russian and you'll note his accent. I'm worried that your honor will have difficulty understanding him, so I am more than happy to have him repeat any answers you need as we go along..." The judge just looked daggers at him and said, "Counsel, I have no problem with his accent. The problem I have is with his honesty." My client leaned over and said, "That's good, right?" Um...yeah. That's GOOD. He is the defendant and their primary witness and the judge just called him a liar. That's like grand slam home run good. | |
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| 9 Users Laughed: |
| | #89 (permalink) |
| Member ![]() Join Date: Sep 2009
Posts: 42
My Mood: | This is going in completely the wrong direction for me. What I want is Rosedale ... wait, he left ... ok, Kapor, and Serpentine in the ring, gloves on, with body oil, give them 5 rounds max. That will sort it all out. "You want a 12(a)? Well here's my 5(b) sandwich!" *smack* |
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| 6 Users Laughed: |
| | #91 (permalink) |
| Senior Member ![]() ![]()
I see what you did there.
Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Internets
Posts: 114
SL Join Date: 3/16/2009
Business: Red Fedora Productions | Ohhh, how I wish I had enough damages to get my old beer-drinking, shotgun toting, ex-alaskan-cop lawyer in on this. Would be entertaining as hell. Is there a Twitter/RSS feed for this suit? Pwease? |
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| 1 User Laughed: |
| | #92 (permalink) | |
| A Face in the Crowd ![]() ![]()
Lost in the Twilight Zone
Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: California
Posts: 186
My Mood: SL Join Date: 7/3/2006 | Quote:
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