Lucifer Baphomet

as if you'd ever tell anyone to piss off.

Caroline, you're far more imaginative than that

Dancien Graves

You did Clancy.

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Aodhan McDunnough

For me it depends on the content and intent of the PM.

If the PM involves some attack on my person be it a threat, harassment, outright accusation (as in not in question form) particularly for something I didn't do, or something not listed that greatly offends me (and I'm hard to offend) ... then all bets are off. I will make it public if I need to.

If it's other than that it stays private. Exception will be discussions that are an important part of some bigger group discussion. But those will be made public to only the group at most.

If it's a funny story (as opposed to embarrassing story) where the humor is of very general nature, I might retell but leave out every bit of identifying information.

caroline ra

Yes but this is the newer nicer friendlier me, remember

Lexxi Gynoid

I have no idea who was banned as I've been busy at work and time on internet low.

I think private communications should remain private (IM's/PM's/e-mails), unless there is permission of the other party, but with the understanding that everything on the computer (or internet) can be used in a court as evidence (gah, all these e-mails I have to wade through, definitely changed my e-mail writing style).

I have no idea and do not have time to look, but was this closed thread that thread that had PM's quoted throughout it? I found that to be . . . discouraging and annoying.

With all this said, I still find that I mostly write with the knowledge that anything I say can be used against me at any moment in time. But then I've been trained to be paranoid.

Oh, and if you come into possession of money to be held for someone else, do not co-mingle funds. That seemed to be stressed in every class I attended. Stupid co-mingling of funds. (angry fist in air being shook . . gah, can't use this forum while at work, none of the fancy buttons and the like work)

(edit: aaaah . . even paragraphs don't work, have to put in like 20 "BR" to get any spaces between the paragraphs)

Ingrid

I think being able to communicate anonymously with other people on the net can bring out the worse in some types of people.

In real life some people keep their negative behavior in check only because they fear that there will be negative consequences for their actions, and not because they have an internal moral compass guiding them. Without real, negative consequences online, these people seem to indulge their every whim regardless of who they hurt.

And unfortunately these few bad apples are enough for me to realize it isn't safe revealing too much about myself or private infoz to anyone online. There are only a small handful of people I would trust on some level.

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"You know how this thread is going to end? I'll tell you how it's gonna end. It's going to end well." - Aimee Weber

Joshua Nightshade

That's not Clancy.

Dnate Mars

For me, it isn't a matter of being hurt by what I have said, more so of not really feeling the need to talk about it publicly. I would see it more of a betrayal of friendship then something I would be ashamed of.

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Tiana Whitfield

I don't agree with this. There are some people that I talk with where I just naturally assume what I say won't be common knowledge. I assure you there are things I say to a certain someone that should never ever be made public... Same vice a versa.

God I would be emo sad if that happened.

With friends I take it as a given if they are unloading their hearts onto my shoulder that it stays private..

Joshua Nightshade

I don't take what Red said quite like that.

I think it's more "Assume everything you tell someone will be shared and prepare for the contingency."

I agree and fully respect that there are things people want kept private. But assuming that something will stay private simply because one says so is setting yourself up for heartbreak if the other party chooses to share.

That was how I interpreted what she said. Not that there are no secrets, but assume whatever you tell someone else won't stay with just them unless you really, really trust them.

Tiana Whitfield

Maybe its the romantic or the niave (sic) fool in me.. but don't you think that mindset is akin to always expecting to be let down?

Joshua Nightshade

Maybe, but I find it's better than feeling betrayed because some gossiped behind your back.

Love

Conversely, one is rarely disappointed.

Lexxi Gynoid

I disagree. I write with the idea that what I say privately should stay private, but with the awareness that it can come out, maybe even become public record (court of law). Even though I've been trained to be paranoid, I'd still be disappointed if something I intended to be private was released to public attention.

Atia

All disappointment and heartbreak aside, I think the point that Joshua is trying to make is that in spite of our desire to trust those we're closest to, it is always a possibilty that our confidences may be broken. Notice I said "may" and "possibility", not "will" and "probability". There are those in each of our lives that would take our secrets to their graves. But not everyone we have a relationship with is of that caliber.

I believe a savy person is aware that anything they type over the internet has a chance of being revealed either in full or worse, taken out of context. Anything in writing period, can be used against you (or in your favor on a good day). I've learned to be very careful as to what I write. Does that make me a harden cynic? I don't think so. Hope still springs eternal in this heart but I'm just a bit wiser now that's all.

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Men are all alike in their promises. It is only in their deeds that they differ. Moliere

Dnate Mars

I would rather feel betrayed then going into everything expecting the worst. But then really I am an eternal optimist. I see the best in people and stay that way until they prove me wrong, instead of expecting the worst and being surprised when I am wrong.

Kristian

I hate you all. Die.

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Envoy Costagravas

Can I quote you, publicly?

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"When Men differ in Opinion, both Sides ought equally to have the Advantage of being heard by the Publick;
and that when Truth and Error have fair Play, the former is always an overmatch for the latter."
~ Benjamin Franklin

Vengence Opus

What is private? What is public?

i suppose the definitions can change with the simple pull of a zipper.

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“If you're losing your soul and you know it, then you've still got a soul left to lose.” ~ Charles Bukowski

Trinity Serpentine

Keeping PMs private is reserved for friends. People that care about me and who I care about. People who have earned and deserve my respect.

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"Never take away a person's dignity: It's worth everything to them and nothing to you." -Frank Barron

“I would rather live my life as if there is a God and die to find out there isn't, than live my life as if there isn't and die to find out there is.” - Albert Camus

Love

So in theory, if you have a falling out with someone whom you used to consider a friend and respect, then they can expect you to reveal their PM's to the world?

Trinity Serpentine

No, not at all. I'm not a vindictive person. Whether we remain friends or not, what was told to me in confidence will stay with me, regardless of the state of our friendship.

Jessyanne

A person who was at one time a friend, and confidant, is really much different than an acquaintance.

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Alexa Lioncourt

I'm sorry but jebus.. this is a flipping debate on semantics. You feel one way, people feel the other. I have to say this thread is pissing me off because it stems from one person posting something with the intent of clarifying a situation that so many people cried about "not understanding". It was posted because a person received an un-solicited PM from more or less a STRANGER and it was not appropriate. I feel like people are missing the damned point.

Easy to tell others what to do when it's not you.....People's level of Offensive are different.


/rant off

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Alexa

Taco F. Rubio: how much does a hill billy cost these days?
Sarah Nerd: A sloppy joe and a pack of smokes

Alexa Lioncourt

P.S. There is a lot to say about timing a question like this Love. I find your timing to be craptastic and trollish.


Edit * I appologize for using the word Trollish (next page) I am not deleting it because my post is referred to later and don't want to change history.