Update... Changes...
I know I've rambled on about how much I enjoy being heavy, and I DO enjoy it, but 260 pounds on a 5'6" frame has taken its toll on my breathing. I won't be doing anything significant and suddenly I need to breathe heavily as if I wasn't breathing enough. I shouldn't have to consciously focus on my breathing all the time, that's just not a good thing.
So--I am hoping to get down to about 215. I don't want to be thinner than that, really, and I'd like much of the weight to be in muscle. The main thing is getting my breathing back to normal.
EDIT, 8-25-09 @ 11:12 pm: UPDATE: I still really do enjoy being big--and I think for now I'm just going to get more physically active, give my respiratory system a good workout on a regular basis, and see if that takes care of the problem. I'm certainly not going to gain any more weight, but I don't really want to go back down to 215 again either.
---------------------------
The band I was in that I had quit last year in October I am most likely joining back up with next Tuesday as lead vocalist again. I know they were pretty harsh towards me near the end there before and did some awful things, but the blame is also on me. We've made up, apologized to each other, and we've all done a lot of growing as people.
The one thing I'm going to tell them that is very important is that I need them to disallow me to do weed. I'm going to tell them that if I ask if I can do weed that they refuse, and if they ever see a pipe in my hand that they're going to be willing to do whatever it takes to get it out of my hand, even if it means them assaulting me. I cannot get back into a weed habit again, period, it destroys me, makes me become a useless member of the band, and it's just bad news FOR ME in general. If they're not willing to agree to do those things, I will not be joining the band.
-------------------------
I have seen my counselor yet again, and my doctor was able to give me a regular prescription for REGULAR Seroquel (instead of the XR stuff that makes me groggy all day and yet I can't get any sleep) and GAU is paying for it. Thank god.
So--I am hoping to get down to about 215. I don't want to be thinner than that, really, and I'd like much of the weight to be in muscle. The main thing is getting my breathing back to normal.
EDIT, 8-25-09 @ 11:12 pm: UPDATE: I still really do enjoy being big--and I think for now I'm just going to get more physically active, give my respiratory system a good workout on a regular basis, and see if that takes care of the problem. I'm certainly not going to gain any more weight, but I don't really want to go back down to 215 again either.
---------------------------
The band I was in that I had quit last year in October I am most likely joining back up with next Tuesday as lead vocalist again. I know they were pretty harsh towards me near the end there before and did some awful things, but the blame is also on me. We've made up, apologized to each other, and we've all done a lot of growing as people.
The one thing I'm going to tell them that is very important is that I need them to disallow me to do weed. I'm going to tell them that if I ask if I can do weed that they refuse, and if they ever see a pipe in my hand that they're going to be willing to do whatever it takes to get it out of my hand, even if it means them assaulting me. I cannot get back into a weed habit again, period, it destroys me, makes me become a useless member of the band, and it's just bad news FOR ME in general. If they're not willing to agree to do those things, I will not be joining the band.
-------------------------
I have seen my counselor yet again, and my doctor was able to give me a regular prescription for REGULAR Seroquel (instead of the XR stuff that makes me groggy all day and yet I can't get any sleep) and GAU is paying for it. Thank god.
Total Comments 0
