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Do The Newbie Jerk

Posted 07-17-2008 at 08:36 AM by Ben Hoark
It's the newest dance craze folks.

Here's what you do:
Walk up to random strangers and ask for money.

Ask for friendship as soon as someone talks to you, and get huffy when they turn you down.

Walk into a club and pester the dancers with questions about how to make money. Or walk up to people who are busy building, and pester them instead.
I was a newbie once. You were a newbie once. All god's chillun were newbies once. There's no shame in it, and I don't have a problem with it. Smile nicely and be polite and I'll even help you to move on from your newbie status.

Just don't be a Newbie Jerk, ok?
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Comments

  1. Old Comment
    Charlemagne Allen's Avatar
    Can we process new people into Newbie Jerkie? That's good eating!
    permalink
    Posted 07-17-2008 at 09:53 AM by Charlemagne Allen Charlemagne Allen is offline
  2. Old Comment
    lulu_dominquez's Avatar
    Omg. That's why I don't like newbies. That's why nobody likes newbies.
    permalink
    Posted 07-23-2008 at 08:30 AM by lulu_dominquez lulu_dominquez is offline
  3. Old Comment
    Xiomara Mendes's Avatar
    Ah, you forgot the most important part of the Newbie Jerk... walk up to random strangers and ask them for sex. Always make sure you do this in PG areas such as welcome areas or shoe stores. You never know who will say yes!
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    Posted 07-24-2008 at 12:03 PM by Xiomara Mendes Xiomara Mendes is offline