Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessica Robertson  I believe people have base personalities.
I don't hold grudges, and generally, I don't believe there is anything to forgive even if someone wrongs me.
I figure, if they wrong me, that it is part of their base personality that they did. Either they know the difference between right and wrong and don't care or they do not place a high enough priority on their friendships to care.
So, instead of forgiving or holding grudges. I always forgive, and I don't hold grudges, but I choose not to be friends with those who I would have to forgive or hold grudges against.
Once I believe I have enough information to determine someone's base personality, I'm either friends with them, or I am not. |
I'm kinda the same way, Jessica, but that's not exactly what I meant by a "grudge".
All of us pick our circle of friends based on very personal criteria - similar interests, background, beliefs, etc. And we exclude those with whom we don't agree or who have argued with us over something personal.
But I think that's different from the strict definition of grudge, which might include going out of your way to cause the person grief or pain, seeking out their posts on an internet board to trash them or argue with them instead of ignoring them. Maybe even stalking them in
SL or RL, trying to mess up their day. That sort of active, aggressive behavior really does create what my New Agey friend calls "negative energy" that can eat at us.
I'm just afraid that if I allow myself to do that, someday I'll end up old and bitter. I think I'd be miserable that way.